Saturday, October 28, 2006

Thank You

how 'bout getting off of these antibiotics
how 'bout stopping eating when i'm full up
how 'bout them transparent dangling carrots
how 'bout that ever elusive kudo

thank you india
thank you terror
thank you disillusionment
thank you frailty
thank you consequence
thank you thank you silence

how 'bout me not blaming you for everything
how 'bout me enjoying the moment for once
how 'bout how good it feels to finaly forgive you
how 'bout grieving it all one at a time

thank you india
thank you terror
thank you disillusionment
thank you frailty
thank you consequence
thank you thank you silence

the moment I let go of it was the moment
i got more than i could handle
the moment I jumped off of it
was the moment I touched down

how 'bout no longer being masochistic
how 'bout remembering your divinity
how 'bout unabashedly bawling your eyes out
how 'bout not equating death with stopping

thank you india
thank you providence
thank you disillusionment
thank you nothingness
thank you clarity
thank you thank you silence

Thursday, October 26, 2006

First day at school/Comeback

Today. First day at school. New year, new semester, same people,
same places, almost same subjects. My school started and what am I? 
Words like violence break my silence.. i saw today people i had forgotten 
they even still breathed. lol.
Im happy school starts cuz im gonna spend more time with my friends.
I decided not to underestimate myself. my personality. my abilitities..
i know i can be better than anyone there.
Im so sleepy right now. I almost didnt sleep at all last night. I think im getting insomniac..
gotta take care of this as well alongside bulimia and depression. Riiiiiight...=P
My HP laptop truly sucks.. its worse than i thought. And problems just keep popping up.
I need to cut my hair. Its kinda emoish now and I dont like them. I want to lose 20kg till Christmas. I think I may have to start going to the gym again.  Yeh yeh it sucks but its the only damn way, alongside diet of course. I want to impress some people but most of all i want to impress my self. Show me that I still CAN. I still have the POWER, I've always had. Its there, nothing has touched it. Billy's back, so back off.

This is ten percent luck, twenty percent skill
Fifteen percent concentrated power of will
Five percent pleasure, fifty percent pain
And a hundred percent reason to remember the name!

Sunday, October 22, 2006

my dream

Its sunday evening. I just had tons of sleep..i saw two dreams.............
First one was kind of a thriller so Im not gonna discuss was lame and scary :P [damn you Samara]
Second one...was really really important.....
I dreamt of.......well, we were in a house that was supposed to be the one we're living nowadays...then 2 girls and 1 boy were there. They were my siblings..they had gone in the past due to family problems......and I almost didnt remember anything about them..just slight images at the back of my mind......I felt so nice that I finally had brothers and sisters....they we shared the exact same problems.....oh it felt so nice. And yeh they were cool! Especially my blonde sister who had left home at 18, and continued on her own........i dont remember much about the others..
but i wish this was true....i would so love it if i had siblings....
anyway, im still alone and i just woke up so i might need some breakf...erm..dinner.
luv ya all

Saturday, October 7, 2006

Saima's Party (preparations)

Well tonight's the party of my friend, Saima. I love her and wish 
her the best! 
It was her birthday day some days ago. <3
There are gonna be many people there. 
Friends and people I don't know. I really hope we're 
gonna have a blast, although Im kinda anxious. Im gonna meet some friends I havent seen in a very long time. 
Like Vicky, Artemis, Maria and others. <3>
Well Im gonna stay cool - have fun - rock-my-fella!
Evaa is gonna come with me. Gardenia too. lol.

Im gonna report the party tomorrow!


Thursday, October 5, 2006

bad day : / was supposed to be a great day..i had planned to go shopping with my friend Eva at syntagma (Athens downtown). Our meet up was scheduled for 12. Then Eva called me and told me that last night she was drunk and blah blah blah and in other words that she couldnt come. I was sad and dissapointed because I had rescheduled my whole day for it. But ok i thought this could happen to I wasnt that mad or anything..

I called my friend John, and asked him to come for a coffee at syntagma. I didn't want to go back home that early. He accepted. I would have to wait for him for about 45 mins so I decided to check out some shops and take a walk. Then I realised that this day, several strikes were scheduled, by teachers and students. The noise, the dirt and the traffic was unbelievable. :/ I dont really love the city anyways. Athens is very polluted and overcrowded.

Anyway, after about 1 hour, and my friend John being kinda late, I ran into my friend Aggela, right outside McDonald's. I hadn't seen her in ages..We had planned over the summer that after the exams of september (we are in the same school) we would start working together, in Altec telecomms. Then Aggela told me that yesterday she signed up for another job with 2 friends of her. I was completely shocked. I felt so bad. :/ kinda used.. All my plans for my job were ruined in a minute.

Then my friend John came, and we decided to walk and talk. We went to starbucks for a frappucino. It was propably the best moment of this bad day. We walked and walked and I ran into a drug user that I knew from another bad experience (he had asked for some of my money some days ago, and I refused.. then he tried to punch me and etc).He was asking for money once again..of course I refused. But I was scared.

Later we walked a bit more and then we had lunch at Goody's. It was so hot..I was sweating all over, my hair was messy with yesterday's gel and I felt so bad.. :/At the end of the skyline I found myself at home, having tons of homework for tomorrow, being dirty and so not cheerful about what happened.. I guess everything that happens, happens for a reason. I may just had a bad day..